The Prey (1983) - Just watch Friday 13th

First of all let me say that I love eighties horror.  I know it's cheesy, not that scary and particularly awful, but so many of the genre's best output falls under the 'so-bad-it's-good' category.  Therefore I figured 'The Prey' would keep me entertained for an hour and a half.  It was a long ninety minutes.

I hear the film was actually released at around eighty minutes and the missing extra footage was put in and is now more likely to be the version you watched.  I wish I'd watched the shorter version.  Often, when a film is good, I can't really think of too much to say about it - other than 'I enjoyed it!' However, with this one I feel I could probably write an essay reeling off everything that's wrong with it.

I know it's a low budget film and I probably shouldn't be too hard on it, but, seriously, it's a hard watch.  I knew what I was in for in terms of story.  Half my DVD collection is filled with masked serial killers murdering stupid teenagers.  That brief plot synopsis is certainly applicable here; it's just this one doesn't work on any level.

It's about three young (overly-sexed, naturally!) couples who go camping in the mountains and fall victim to a killer.  Nothing wrong with that premise, but, if you're hoping for gore - you won't find it here.  It probably didn't have the budget.  No matter if the characters are good, right?  Wrong.  They're not.  I don't expect Oscar-worthy acting from a horror movie, but sometimes I figured I could probably read the actors' lines with more emotion and believability!  What about the killer?  Was he imaginative?  Nope.  Where as films like 'Friday 13th' had original and memorable killers, this one isn't even shown for 99% of the screen time.  Perhaps worst (or weirdest?) of all was the fact that the film-makers felt the need to insert plenty of 'nature shots' in the film.  Every scene is preceded by an unrelated shot of a deer, or racoon or something - either that or the mountain range.  Then you get the wooden characters just walking.  There's an old joke about the 'Lord of the Rings' movies that goes along the lines that the trilogy is just nine hours of people walking.  But I don't think you've seen 'on screen walking' until you've watched 'The Prey.' There are a few pointless sub-plots which drag out for longer than they should and about a twenty minute segment roughly in the middle of the film which feels like a completely different movie of its own (it's supposed to be a sort of 'origin story' for the killer) and doesn't really add anything.

I only continued watching this movie just because I kept telling myself that it would pick up in the final act.  I guess it did - if you class the 'final act' as the last five minutes of a film that clocks in at over an hour and a half.  There are so many better slasher films out there.  Pick one.  Trust me, it'll be much more enjoyable.

3/10 Jabba the Hutt wipes himself down with this film