Outpost - Perfect (for what it is)

Okay, so ‘perfect’ is probably not a term that should be used to describe a film about ghost-Nazis stalking a team of mercenaries in the wastelands of Eastern Europe, but, for what it is, ‘Outpost’ is a pretty damn good film.

Hopefully, if you’ve fully digested my first paragraph about the ghost-Nazis (or zombie-Nazis – take your pick) you won’t be expecting a deep and intellectual film, filled with emotional depth and fulfilling character arcs and plot twists.  So, if you’re in the mood for a damn tense (and pretty creepy) little story, with decent action scenes and characters you may actually care about, then try this. 

As I mentioned, a team of - possibly the most 'multinational' - mercenaries are paid to escort a scientist to an old military facility deep in Eastern Europe.  They don't know why they're there, but they soon find they're forced to 'dig in' and fend off waves of undead nasties.

The cast is pretty solid and, with many 'horror' movies, many of the cast are simply there to die in horrific ways.  However - believe it or not - you might actually remember some of the characters after the credits have rolled.  Okay, so you probably won't remember their actual names, but you'll at least care about them when they meet their demise (and refer to them only by their nationalities).

It's all set around a pretty bland base/facility, i.e. one set and the woodland area directly above ground.  Now, granted this does mean it could be described as 'cheap,' but, in this case, it does add to the real tense and claustrophobic atmosphere, especially in terms of the team having literally nowhere to run when their unstoppable enemy really starts to push hard.

'Outpost' is a B-movie.  It never really tries to be anything else.  It doesn’t have much of a budget, but what it does have it uses well.  So, if you like your action/war/horror movies short and to the point, you really could do worse than to watch 'Outpost' (just don’t get it confused with any of the – very inferior – sequels!

8/10 The Force is definitely strong with this one

Red - Die Hard with a walking stick

I don’t know why I feel so ‘dirty’ watching ‘Red.’ Deep down I know it’s hardly Shakespeare and I should never rate it more than a 2/5.  However, there’s something oddly satisfying from watching a load of old actors go crazy with guns and take out wave after wave of trained henchmen like they were immortal. ‘Red’ is effectively an action-thriller, with a healthy dose of ‘Bourne-like’ spy-movie thrown in there.  Bruce Willis plays a retired John McClane (not really, but he might as well – effectively a retired CIA killer) who, something, something, something, ends up on the run with a woman he’s been flirting with over the phone.  Naturally, there’s hired government killers on his trail at every turn and he must fight for survival every step of the way while he desperately tries to prove his innocence.  Think that plot synopsis sounds familiar?  Well, it does.  It’s basically the same as every other recent (Bourne clone) spy movie made in the last few years.  It’s nothing new, but it is fun.

I guess you could say that it’s a bit of a gimmick having the lead being an ‘elderly’ balding (sorry Bruce!) hero, as opposed to a young man with a nice tan and full head of hair on the run.  In fact… it is the ‘age factor’ that is this film’s only real selling point.  Bruce doesn’t go it alone, he’s helped out by an aging John Malkovich, an aging Morgan Freeman and an aging Helen Mirran – all of which are quite capable to murdering any young, highly-trained upstart who gets in their way.  And, yes, it is fun to see them in action.  

Despite the serious subject matter of death at every turn, the film never even attempts to take itself seriously.  It knows it’s daft and over the top and that’s its main saving grace.  If it tried to make us think that a bunch of senior citizens could really do all this then it would be ridiculous.  However, throughout all the car chases and shootouts it almost parodies itself.

If you like your action movies fun (like pre Daniel Craig Bond) then you should appreciate this, plus if you’re a fan of Bruce Willis doing what he does best, or just want to see Helen Mirren wield a sniper’s rifle, then you should definitely enjoy this.  The plot is simple, Karl Urban is kind of wasted as the film’s primary antagonist, hell bent on Willis’ capture/death, but he’s a nice addition anyway.  Just don’t think too deeply about why an older man still has to have a considerably younger love interest at his side!

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

Lesbian Vampire Killers - Politically incorrect fun

Some DVDs should come with instructions.  In the case of 'Lesbian Vampire Killers' such instructions should probably read: Lower IQ sufficiently then insert disc into player, sit back and enjoy.  Yes, there is officially no brainpower required to get something out of this movie.

Two men, played by Mathew Horne and James Corden (no, don't hate it because Corden's in it - this was made before he apparently got on everyone's nerves!), decide to take a random trip to an out-of-the-way little village in England, only to get mixed up in an ancient curse which turns the village's female population into... well, if you've read the title then you can probably guess.

A lot of people pigeonhole this film into the 'horror/comedy' genre.  But I'd claim it was more an outright 'comedy.' Yes, there are vampires involved and, yes, they bite people but that's about as 'horrific' as it goes.  There's very little in the way of gore and even less moments that will actually scare you (oh, and if you're tempted to watched based on the 'lesbian' aspect - there's only really hot women/vampires kissing - you can probably find more than that online!).  However, it's the banter between the two main leads that really makes this film worth a watch.

They've starred together before in the British TV sitcom 'Gavin and Stacey' (which I haven't seen), but I'm told these two new characters are different enough from their previous creations to set them apart.  Plus already working together improves the chemistry between them.

Ultimately, 'Lesbian Vampire Killers' is a spoof of the 'vampire genre' and takes great delight in sending up all the cliches that have been around from 'Buffy' through to 'True Blood.' Paul McGann comes into the film about three quarters of the way through and it's always fun seeing a more 'well respected' actor sending himself up as the local priest.  The women are just, er, there, so if you're hoping for any groundbreaking female leads then you're probably looking in the wrong place.

'Lesbian Vampire Killers' is just good daft fun.  If you have low expectations, plus don't mind foul language and want to see the vampire genre ripped on, then give his a go.  Oh, and when I say 'foul' language, I should probably say there's also plenty of 'politically incorrect' language too.  So, if you're offended by that, walk on.

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

28 Days Later - Two horror films for the price of one

It's pretty much taken for granted that '28 Days Later' is a seminal British horror film. And it is. It helped revitalise the `zombie genre' by making the undead into more than just - George Romero-style - `shufflers.' It also started a trend in `disaster movies' showing well-known locations (in this case London) eerily deserted.

Everyman, Jim, wakes up from a coma to find a disease has spread through Britain turning everyone into zombies (or the `infected' if we're being technical, as they're still alive). Now he must look for survivors and stay one step ahead of the psychotic enemy.

You'll find not many people will say anything too negative about 28 Days Later. It's actually pretty good from beginning to end. However, there is a distinct change of tone midway through the film that does seem to grate on even the most diehard of fans. It's like two horror films stuck together. The second could be completely independent to the first.

However, both halves have their merits. The first half is creepy and sets the tone for a different type of ending that what's to come. The second half is more action-orientated and the infected (of which have been the bad guys during the first half) seem to take a back seat to human adversaries.

But no matter how much the change annoys you, the acting is still fine, the sets terrifically creepy, the characters charming enough for us to care about their fates and the direction - naturally - slick, courtesy of Danny Boyle.

All in all, this is a British classic horror that has spawned numerous inferior imitations. If you like your horror gritty, then this one is for you.

10/10 The Monty Python Knights of Camelot are currently looking for this

You're Next - Generic home invasion stuff

Okay, maybe I'm being a little harsh with my title, but the horror genre is currently littered with instances of nasty people getting inside your house, only to terrorise you, before murdering you in the most grisly way possible.

Another family. Another big house. Another gathering of people which is going to be interrupted by a gang of nutters. Guess what... mobiles don't work so the family has to tend off the siege themselves.

First the good: the banter between the family is believable and the gore is nice. Plus there are some moments of dark humour thrown in here and there to lighten the atmosphere.

The bad: all the regular clichés are included. Simply by making yet another `home invasion' movie, you're limiting yourself as to how many different directions you can go in. Plus it looks a bit cheap and the acting is even sub-standard for a horror film.

Personally, I'm a little tired of the genre, however, seeing as movies like it are still being made, I have to assume that there's still a market for it. So, if you're into the genre, or haven't seen any films like this before, then you might want to give it a go. It's not as bad as some of its contemporaries, but will never really be a classic due to its lack of originality.

For fans of the genre only.

5/10 a hard trek, a bit like unicycling to Mordor and back

Valkyrie - Nearly Hitler's downfall

Although the Second World War should never be forgotten, it's fair to say that war movies are hardly big money-spinners at the box office right now.  Perhaps it's because we're used to see the Allies winning in the end?  However, 'Valkyrie' is told from an entirely German perspective. 

It's set in the dying days of the war and Hitler is determined to fight until the last man, bringing down Germany if it comes to it.  So a rouge group of German officers (led by an eyepatch-wearing/prosthetic hand-sporting, Tom Cruise) stages a plan to assassinate him and arrange a truce with the Allies.

Tom Cruise can act, if given the right part.  Here he doesn't have to do too much.  He's largely here for `star power' value.  However, it's the story that's important rather than who's in it.  Despite the fact that you'll probably know the ending, it's actually pretty tense as the Germans fight their own leader and try to bring a less devastating conclusion to the war.

If you think of recent (and excellent) war movies, such as 'Saving Private Ryan' and 'Dunkirk,' you may be expecting at least some big budget battles involving either legions of Allied troops versus Nazis.  However, you won't be getting any of those here.  Although everything on screen is 'perfect' in terms of setting and atmosphere, 'Valkyrie' doesn't contain a single action scene involving tanks or Spitfires.  It's all about the politics behind the millions of young men and women who died during the conflict.

Bonus points to the film for putting together a large group of some of the best British actors to play various German roles (and Eddie Izzard, who sneaked in there somehow - bless him).  All of the main cast are playing people who actually existing and I checked online and was pleased to see at how well the actors were cast in order to look like those they were portraying.

If you fancy something a bit more historically accurate (although I'm told 'Valkyrie' is reasonably accurate) then this is definitely worth a go, simply because it tells a true story from World War II that isn't as widely known as, for example, the Battle of Britain or the D-Day landings.  And, as I said, it's also an interesting take to see some of those who wore the imfamous Nazi uniform.  It shows that just because someone was in the German army during the conflict it didn't mean they were absolute followers of everything Hitler perpetuated.  Perhaps `Downfall' (an excellent German-made film about Hitler's last days which I absolutely recommend you watch) could even be a sort of sequel to this?

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

Hawk the Slayer - The best ‘worst’ film ever made

‘Hawk the Slayer’ deserves top marks.  Not because it’s that good, but simply because of the effort put into it.  It is truly an awful film with few genuinely redeeming features, yet it’s played ‘straight’ all the way through.  Someone wrote online, ‘If the ‘Carry On...’ team ever made a serious ‘sword and sorcery’ film then it would be this.

Therefore, the only people who will ever get anything out of this film will be those who can appreciate those ‘so bad they’re good’ films, or people (like me) who watched it as a child and still have nostalgic feelings towards it (for the record, me and my friends ‘played’ Hawk the Slayer in the playground in junior school).

I will start by listing (at least some) of this movie’s bad points (mainly because it – technically – doesn’t have any good ones).  All ‘bad points’ can also be looked at as good points because they’re so laughably fun.  The acting.  Oh dear.  On the one hand you have Jack Palance who does his best to hiss his way through every scene going and on the other, you have John Terry (no, not the footballer, although his acting may be at least on a par with our leading man’s) who has a daft haircut which goes some way to take your mind off his acting abilities.  He teams up with a giant (who isn’t very tall), a dwarf (who isn’t very short), a man with one hand (or rather his ‘missing’ hand wrapped in a bandage) and an elf (who acts like Mr Spock only with less light-heartedness).  These famous five then take on Jack Palance’s merry men in a variety of different places in the British woods.

Then you have the special effects.  They consist of people being killed by coloured ping pong balls and covered (to death) in silly string (no, seriously). 

The action scenes have to be seen to be believed.  By repeatedly using fast-paced editing shots on someone firing a bow and arrow or crossbow, you get an almost ‘machine gun-like’ effect (the bad guys don’t stand a chance!).

It’s fair to say that Hawk the Slayer is the best of the worst films ever made.  It’s so bad you have to see it to believe it.  Then, if you still haven’t had enough, I could also recommend Star Crash (which is so bad it’s good, only in space instead of the British woods).

9/10 almost as perfect as The Godfather

Action Jackson - Needs more love

'Action Jackson' is a classic.  Actually, it's probably not.  It's pretty terrible in as many ways as it's good.  It's almost one of those 'so-bad-it's-good' type films, only it's just about credible enough to be taken - semi - seriously.

After the 'Rocky' film and 'Predator' there was a certain amount of money on Carl Weathers being a bit of an action star in his own right.  Therefore, he was given 'Action Jackson' as a vehicle to flex more than just his impressive biceps. 'Action' Jackson is a cop who is a bit of a rebel and does things his own way to get the job done.  Now there's a cinema cliche if ever I heard one.  So, he's got to get the bad guys while throwing his police badge at his long-suffering police chief in defiance.  Again, nothing new.

And yet, for all its flaws, it's actually a highly-watchable little number which can still be enjoyed if you're in the mood for this sort of film.  In today's cinematic climate of making all 'action' films uber serious and dark and gritty.  It's nice to step back to yesteryear and see a cheesy, dumb, big ol' series of over-the-top explosions and stereotypical characters.  This is what you'll get here.

I guess if the film does have flaws (or major ones) then it's that Carl Weathers, despite looking the part, shows he's probably not quite up to headlining a film on his own.  However, that may be a little unfair as I've read some interviews with him where he says about how much of the film kept changing in post production and things got a little all over the place.  He's hardly given much in terms of a script to work with and much of his participation is just him turning up and thumping bad guys.  There aren't that many memorable secondary characters to talk about.  Obviously you have the 'shouty' police chief and a generic love interest, but for those of you - like me - who have seen many eighties action movies, you may spot a few familiar faces from other similar movies (mainly henchmen).

If you've seen one eighties action movie (especially those in the 'cop' genre) then you'll probably be able to predict what's going to happen here beat for beat.  But, that's no bad thing.  You're hardly meant to think about this film's deep and meaningful social commentary - just enjoy it for what it is.

You could call it a 'poor man's 'Lethal Weapon'' and that kind of sums it up, so you're going to have to enjoy your eighties action movies and be prepared not to take anything seriously here to get maximum enjoyment out of this.  Luckily, I can do that, so I had a great time with this one.  Despite technically 'bombing' at the Box Office when it was released, at least it seems that 'Action Jackson' has found some love over the years with the help of a cult following.  And deservedly so!

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

Our Idiot Brother - A good rom-com which isn't really one

`Our Idiot Brother' is basically a romantic comedy, only it isn't. It sort of utilises all elements of the format which make up your usual rom-com, only the story doesn't centre around a man and a woman coming together. It's about a man who just says and does the wrong thing most of the time. Then, when he comes out of prison, he's forced upon his three sisters and he goes about - albeit accidentally - destroying their lives.

Luckily, the situations are just about plausible and there are a few good laughs to be gained from them. However, the major drawback is that none of the characters are that likable. The main character constantly says the wrong thing. Now, all of us have done that once in a while, but he manages it every time in every situation. And his sisters all seem to be completely self-absorbed and shallow, who, in some way, have created their negative situations which their brother has then exposed.

If you like any of the major actors then it's a bonus and, like I say, there are some laughs to be had. Keep your expectations low and you should get more out of it. At least it's short, so it doesn't drag on.

6/10 May just keep you awake if Freddy Krueger was haunting your nights

Pulse - Not a great film (but I enjoyed it anyway)

If you check out other reviews for the U.S. remake of the Japanese horror film `Pulse' you'll see that the majority of people hated it. And I can see why. The first time I watched it I wasn't interested to begin with. It came across as your regular slasher film, only with computer ghosts stalking and killing teenagers instead of a physical killer.

Then there were the - obvious - similarities to the (far superior) 'The Ring.' However, I thought it actually picked up a bit of pace in the second half. Once the more `apocalyptic' side of the story takes over then there are a few nice moments.  We start off meeting a young man who's obviously being haunted by something nasty that keeps following him through a university campus.  However, he then disappears and we're introduced to a particularly forgettable group of your typical horror movie youngsters.  You have the 'perky blonde heroine,' the 'black best friend,' the 'friend-zoned male' and the 'good-looking potential hunk for the perky blonde to fall for.' Yup, they're all there.

This group of stereotypes have to then investigate what happened, while at the same time trying not to become the latest victims to the computer-generated nasties.  It was only on the second (or possibly third) viewing that I noticed how many famous names were attached to the making of this film.  If you can gloss over the obvious 'Harvey Weinstein' in the opening credit then you may notice that Wes Craven had a hand in the story.  Now, don't go hoping that 'Pulse' is up to any of his greatest work, but I'm guessing his involvement is perhaps the main reason that this film is - slightly - more than a cut above the average horror film.

If you have high expectations for this film, then you'll definitely hate it. However, if you're just looking for a (slightly) better than average horror flick then give it a go. Acting - average. Plot - average. Special effects - average. In fact, it ticks off pretty much every horror clicle going, but at least the second half is a lot more fun that the first.  And I did appreciate the ending (no spoilers!).  So, if you're in the right mood, you may give it that extra `mark' to turn its rating from a 6 to a 7/10.

The Last Exorcism: Part II - It must have been hard to make a film this dull

Okay, I try to do a little more than just blatantly slag off a film, but with `The Last Exorcism Part II' it's kind of hard not to.

I didn't expect to enjoy the first film and, amazingly, I was in for a pleasant surprise. It may have been a `found footage' film, but it was enjoyably creepy, despite being an overused genre about an overused subject matter.

Therefore, based on the first movie alone, I decided to watch the sequel. I really wish I hadn't. It's a completely different type of film for a start, i.e. not `found footage.' I guess the film-makers wanted not to just do a rehash of the first movie and try something different. What they came up with was simply one of the more boring films ever made.

We follow the girl from the first story, now trying to lead a normal life. But she can't. The spirit she fought before wants to be in her again. Things bump around wherever she goes, therefore, in turn, making her jump. That's about it. She has a gaggle of female friends who do little more than giggle and make clichéd remarks. Plus there's a love interest for out main lead. It adds nothing to the plot, other than detracting yet further from anything vaguely scary.

The Last Exorcism (part one) was nothing that special, but at least it was watchable enough to be enjoyable (if you like low budget horror flicks). Part II, on the other hand, is just dull with no redeeming features.

Maybe I should have known better than to watch a sequel to a film with the word `last' in the title. Dear film-makers, PLEASE make part II the absolute last this time. I won't be watching `The Last Last Last Exorcism' if it ever sees the light of day.

1/10 This might as well have been written, directed and produced by Uwe Boll

Maggie - Arnie flexes his (acting) muscles

I've probably seen (and enjoyed!) pretty much every Arnold Schwarzenegger movie since 1984's 'The Terminator' (yes, even finding some enjoyment in his pun-filled 'Mr Freeze' performance in 'Batman and Robin' - I'm that much of an Arnie fan).  You could say that I have a preconception or two about what I'm going to get when I see his long name over a film's title.  And, because of that, I'm writing this review after my SECOND viewing of 2015's 'Maggie.' The reason being, I only got through about a third of the film on its DVD release.  Now I've finally accepted what I'm getting I can sit through the whole thing.

I should also mention that I loved zombie movies.  Not just because 'The Walking Dead' is so popular (well, maybe not lately, but it was pretty cool in its day!), but all the way back from George A Romero's 'Night of the Living Dead' saga.  Therefore, I was in cinema heaven when I heard Arnie was going to star in a 'zombie movie.' I could only imagine him kitting himself out with all sorts of 'Commando' style weapons and taking on hordes of flesh-eating ghouls with only his pecs and a witty quip or two for protection.  It's fair to say that 'Maggie' is not that kind of zombie film.

If you believe the trivia online, Arnie didn't actually take payment for his role in this film and its budget is the lowest he's been associated with since 'The Terminator.' Here, he plays 'Wade Vogal' a loving father whose daughter (Maggie - surprise, surprise!) has recently been bitten by a zombie and therefore only has a few weeks left to live.  Yes, apparently people here can last 'weeks' before turning into the undead - eat your heart out '28 Days Later.' And, as the title suggests, Arnie isn't technically the focus of the story.  Abigale Breslin plays the titular character and effectively carries the movie.  She's the one who is faced with the knowledge that she won't be here in only a couple of weeks, or at least will not be the same person she is now, i.e. will be crazing the flesh of her family and risking their lives if she stays with them.

So, 'Maggie' is not really your 'Resident Evil' sort of zombie film.  Arnie doesn't so much as kill everything that moves with machine guns, but spends his time brooding over the impending doom that he has no way of stopping when it comes to the fate of his daughter.  And, if you've ever thought that the big man's acting ability was limited to playing stone cold cyborgs then 'Maggie' goes some way to prove that he can do more than just look menacing in a leather jacket and sunglasses.

So, if - like me - you initially sit down to watch a gung-ho action/horror flick with Arnie mowing down endless legions or walking corpses, then you'll probably do what I did and walk away.  However, if you're in the mood for something a lot more subtle and bleak with touching performances then this one might be worth adding to your watchlist.  Lately, zombie movies have been done every way possible and, although  you can probably find some of the themes touched here in other sources, it's still worth a watch it you're a fan of the genre.

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance - An action movie by the numbers 

If you like cheesy, daft, over-the-top action films (like me for example), you probably enjoyed Ghost Rider. Therefore, you may be drawn into watching the sequel - Spirit of Vengeance.

I'm currently writing this review while the credits are rolling. I am doing this for one reason only: if I leave it another hour, I might well have forgotten the entire film.

It was like someone took a hero, inserted a couple of bad guys along the way, added a monster at the end and an annoying kid to rescue and trotted it out as a film.

This has to be the most generic action film ever made.

I would like to try and say something negative about it - something that really got my blood boiling, but I can't. There's absolutely nothing bad to say about it. Only there's nothing good to say about it either. It's just completely middle-of-the-road.

The only way this film can be perceived as `amazing' is if an alien came down from space, after living on a planet with no action films, and watched this. Basically, if you've never seen an action film before, you'll probably be blown away.

Me, I've seen one or two before and, now I'm reaching the end of the review I'm having real trouble actually remembering what I'm reviewing. I think it had Nicolas Cage in it, or maybe it was John Travolta?

Did I just see someone's head on fire?

4/10 Dumb and Dumber would probably appreciate this film

Sexy Beast - Kingsley rules

These days I always think of 'Iron Man 3' when I see 2000's 'Sexy Beast.' I'm not versed in the 'Iron Man' comics, but I understood that 'The Mandarin' was Iron Man's 'nemesis.' Therefore, people got very excited when an actor as well-respected as Sir Ben Kingsley was cast in the role, only for him to be completely 'underused.' Personally, I still thought he was good in Marvel's end to the 'Iron Man' trilogy, but I couldn't help but wonder if Tony Stark had to face 'Don Logan' whether he'd be able to win so easily.

'Sexy Beast' is a gangster film which is about a retired criminal, Gal, (Ray Winstone) who's living the 'high-life' in sunny Spain on the profits of his crimes.  However, what he doesn't know is that he's had the 'honour' of being selected for one last job by Don Logan (Kingsley).  And, as you'll find out if you watch this film, Logan isn't the kind of guy who takes a 'No' to his 'kind' offer.

The film is one of those that's sort of in 'two halves.' The first is set in Spain and charts Don's attempts to persuade Gal to come back to London to carry out a robbery.  The second half... well, you'll just have to find out.  However the movie ends, one thing is clear - Kingsley steals every scene.  He's awesome.  Naturally, his brilliance doesn't mean that he's a 'relatable' character who you'd like to hang out with.  In fact, he's more likely to haunt your dreams in a way that only Freddy Kruger could.  Kingsley is truly terrifying in the role and 'Sexy Beast' is worth watching purely for his performance alone.

Of course that's not to say that Ray Winstone and the rest of the cast aren't good.  It's just that Kingsley is just so perfect in the role that he eclipses everyone around him.  It probably helps if you're into British gangster films and you should be warned about the strong language, violence and some sexual content (not as much sex as you may think, despite the - slightly misleading - title!).  Get ready for one hell of a tense ride which should be at the top of Sir Ben Kingsley's C.V.

8/10 The Force is definitely strong with this one

Escape Plan - Old school action

It’s been amazing that these two – Sly and Arnie – have never got together on screen before (excluding the cameos in The Expendables movies), as they do work rather well together.

It focuses on the two men’s attempts to escape a futuristic prison which has been custom- built to prevent escapes. Guess what… it’s about to be put to its limits. So, baring in mind that the story takes place in a prison, there’s plenty of faceless thugs for our two action heroes to pound, plus a villainous warden and his henchman Vinnie Jones to sort out along the way.

This is Sly’s movie, so he does get more screen time and people to punch than Arnie, so Arnie fans may feel just a little short-changed. However, seeing as the two actors have known each other for many years, there’s a natural rapport between them which shines out. Arnie’s acting (yes, acting!) seems to have suffered since being in politics, seeming a bit stilted in The Last Stand and The Expendables, but he seems to be regaining his old late eighties/early nineties charm.

If you like either or both the aging escape-artists, you should enjoy this film, even if it’s just to watch them on screen (properly) for the first time. There’s your typical amount of action and mayhem as they figure out how to break out. My only gripe was that it was a little longer than I expected, clocking in at nearly two hours. Shave about 10-15 minutes off the runtime and you’d have a much tighter movie.

8/10 The Force is definitely strong with this one

Escape Plan - Old school action

It’s been amazing that these two – Sly and Arnie – have never got together on screen before (excluding the cameos in The Expendables movies), as they do work rather well together.

It focuses on the two men’s attempts to escape a futuristic prison which has been custom- built to prevent escapes. Guess what… it’s about to be put to its limits. So, baring in mind that the story takes place in a prison, there’s plenty of faceless thugs for our two action heroes to pound, plus a villainous warden and his henchman Vinnie Jones to sort out along the way.

This is Sly’s movie, so he does get more screen time and people to punch than Arnie, so Arnie fans may feel just a little short-changed. However, seeing as the two actors have known each other for many years, there’s a natural rapport between them which shines out. Arnie’s acting (yes, acting!) seems to have suffered since being in politics, seeming a bit stilted in The Last Stand and The Expendables, but he seems to be regaining his old late eighties/early nineties charm.

If you like either or both the aging escape-artists, you should enjoy this film, even if it’s just to watch them on screen (properly) for the first time. There’s your typical amount of action and mayhem as they figure out how to break out. My only gripe was that it was a little longer than I expected, clocking in at nearly two hours. Shave about 10-15 minutes off the runtime and you’d have a much tighter movie.

8/10 The Force is definitely strong with this one