Muck – C’mon, it’s not that bad!

Sometimes, I watch a film and really enjoy it.  Then, I come to review it and see on the website that everyone else totally despises it.  I’m guessing I must have seen something in ‘Muck’ that others didn’t. 

So, these days ‘slasher’ films are hardly the novelty they once were (I think they got ‘old’ somewhere in the late seventies and most are poor clones of either the ‘Texas Chainsaw’ films or of the ‘Halloween’ franchise. However, occasionally one comes along which stands out among the piles of machetes and ice hockey masks.  And this one did for me (although, judging by the ratings, I guess it stood out in the WRONG way for other people!).

To begin with, the story starts off half way through the story – I will explain.  Instead of the car-load of annoyingly good-looking American teenagers driving somewhere remote and getting picked off one by one.  Here, half of them have already fallen victim to some unseen evil force and they’re already in a fight for survival.  Then, when they do decide to take refuge in an abandoned holiday home in the middle of a swamp (okay, you may have to suspend your disbelief to believe that someone would actually have a holiday home in the middle of a deadly swamp, but we’ll just gloss over that for now!) whatever was after them hasn’t finished with them.  At least there is a pause in the action when they make a fair few self-knowing references which proves that whoever wrote this is well aware of the clichés attached with the genre and does their best to poke fun at them and subvert them.

However, I get the impression that these attempts to ‘subvert’ the slasher clichés may have led to Muck’s low ratings on many websites.  A lot of criticism levelled at the story is that it’s a ‘mess’ and ‘all over the place.’ I can see why people may think this as the story does tend to bounce here and there and give us more characters than the average film of its type.  Plus it introduces new characters at times when you probably feel that you’ve met the entire cast.  Then you have the nudity.  If you’re easily offended by the naked female anatomy then you definitely shouldn’t watch this.  The film-makers even went as far as to employ ‘professional’ ladies who would be less inhibited when it comes to displaying themselves.  Plus you have the gore, which is pretty good and steers away from CGI effects as much as it can.  My only real gripe was with the ending (and when I say ‘ending’ I mean literally the ending – ‘final shot’ so to speak – which I felt didn’t work, but you’ll see for yourselves if you agree.

Yes, Muck may be a little uneven here and there, but I felt that it knew what it was and never tried to be anything different.  It knows it’s cheesy and over-the-top and I’m sure they must have watched ‘Evil Dead’ a few times during the writing process, as the (eventual) lead may bears more than a little resemblance to our old hero ‘Ash.’

It’s no classic, but it was never intended to be.  It’s meant to be a cheeky, fun nod to the genre.  Expect everything to be turned up to eleven.  Apart from the reviews of course, but, in my opinion, it’s definitely worth more than a 2/10 (it’s current rating at the time of writing this review on a major film website).

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

Triple 9 – Should have been better

Sometimes, you see a film advertised and you think ’How can this possibly fail?’ Then, upon sitting through it, you wonder how the film-makers managed to make something that looked so awesome come across as so mediocre. And that’s what ‘Triple 9’ is – mediocre.  It’s not bad.  I didn’t hate it.  I just thought that, judging by the acting talent on display, that it should have been so much more special than what it actually was.

It’s about a squad of ‘dirty’ cops who, along with upholding the bits of the law that suit them, also help criminals rob banks.  But, somewhere along the way they seemed to forget that criminals – being criminals – can’t always be trusted to uphold their side of a bargain.  Naturally, the gang they’re working for want a little more than was originally offered and conflict arises.

The reason Triple 9 looked so good was the cast of characters – anything with Norman Reedus (or ‘Daryl’ from The Walking Dead) and Aaron Paul (or ‘Jessie’ from Breaking Bad) can’t be all bad, can it?  Well, like I say, it’s not all bad, it’s just pretty forgettable.  Apart from one scene that occurred around the middle of the film where the cops storm a drugs den – that’s pretty intense and comes across as well researched as to how real police would undertake such an operation.  However, it’s been about a week since I watched Triple 9 and, apart from that and the meaning of the phrase ‘Triple 9’ itself, there really isn’t that much I can remember about it.  Or rather than the actors I really wanted to see in the film aren’t in it as much as I’d hoped and, where they were, they were criminally underused.

I know I’m being harsh.  But it’s just if you’ve seen as many ‘cops and robbers’ movies as I have over the years then you really need something very different to set one apart.  And this one just didn’t have what I was looking for.  Yes, it’s stylish and well-directed, plus you have the acting talent on offer and, if you’re looking for realism then you’ll find a fair amount of violence here.  However, in the course of film history, I’m guessing that this will just be written off as yet another cops and robbers movie.  Pity.

6/10 Should probably keep you awake if Freddy Krueger was haunting your nights

The Weather Man - It never rains but it pours for Cage

‘The Weather Man’ – a film about the life and times of a Chicago news weather man, or the last decent film Nicholas Cage has made (to date).  It’s up to you to decide.  Once upon a time Cage was Box Office dynamite.  Nowadays, his star has shone on the ‘direct-to-DVD’ market and has become synonymous with over-acting and that awful remake of ‘The Wicker Man.’

However, back in the day he used to be pretty good.  Here, his ‘over-acting’ is turned down a notch or two and he does what he does best – give a decent performance.  He plays a down-on-his-luck weather man for a (not particularly prestigious TV station.  Just because he gets the occasional perk of being a – minor – celebrity, doesn’t mean his life is going that well.  His wife has left him and kept the kids and house, his dad (wonderfully played by Michael Caine – sporting an unusual American accent) is pretty aloof, people keep throwing fast food at him on the street and the least said about his estranged kids the better.  Therefore, despite his apparently privileged lifestyle, he still has plenty to complain about.

I really enjoyed this film, which Cage bears completely on his shoulders.  I really do think it’s his (last) best performance.  If there is one criticism that might be levelled at the film it’s that it’s a little ‘unfocused.’ The story doesn’t really go anywhere as it’s mainly about following his life as he tries to… well, just go about his day to day business.  There’s no real ‘beginning, middle and end’ as there is with most standard Hollywood films.

It’s a ‘bittersweet’ drama that borders on black comedy.  So, if you’re a fan of Cage at his best, or just like dark family dramas which have a touch of social commentary and don’t necessarily go anywhere, you should get something out of this one.  Alas, poor Nick we remember him fondly.

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

Let the Right One in - Nice take on the whole ‘vampire myth’

Sometimes you may wonder if every different version of those infamous blood-suckers hasn’t already been done to death.  The big screen has had every incarnation from a planet run by vampires (Daybreakers) to vampires that came from space (Lifeforce) and twinkling vampires (that franchise that cannot be named).  So, here we have a Swedish offering based on the book of the same name – ‘Let the Right One in.’

It’s set in the eighties if you’re wondering where the ‘bad’ haircuts came from and we’re introduced to a young lad who is being bullied at school (Oskar).  Now, rather than tell a responsible adult about his troubles, he enlists the help of the ‘new kid on the block’ (Eli). And, it just so happens that the little girl who has moved into the flat next door is full of secrets – mainly associated with the blood-thirsty deaths that have been happening in the community ever since the girl moved into the neighbourhood.

I can’t compare the big screen adaptation to the book as I haven’t read it, but it certainly is an ‘earthy’ take on vampires.  By that I mean that if you can suspend your disbelief to appreciate immortal bloodsuckers living among us, then you will be able to believe that this is probably how it would go.

It’s a pretty bleak film, not just in content (killer-child vampires are hardly happy-go-lucky types), but also in look and feel.  The snowy setting is quiet and eerie and also used to perfection to create a look and feel for the film.  There’s plenty of great shots that are brilliantly-framed and even have a slight ‘Kubrick-feel’ to them (my opinion, anyway).

‘Let the Right One in’ won’t be for everyone.  It’s hardly fast-paced and you’ll have to put up with the subtitles (those foreign films, eh?).  Plus there is a decent amount of gore and red stuff flying here and there.  I noticed a couple of slightly cheap-looking CGI effects in there, but I’m guessing the film didn’t have the budget to do any better and I can forgive those on account of the overall story and feel.

There is an American remake out there and it’s not that bad either, however it’s so similar that if you like the sound of this sort of deep, slow, arty vampire tale then you might as well just watch the original.

8/10 The Force is definitely strong with this one

No Escape - Not the Ray Liotta version

Growing up in the nineties the film ‘No Escape’ always brought up images of Ray Liotta’s (possibly only!) attempt at headlining a major motion picture.  However, there are no gangs of cannibals here in a sci-fi prison island.  Although, to be fair, Owen Wilson and his family doesn’t have it that much easier!

Wilson leaves America with his family and goes to work in a far eastern country.  All sounds perfectly okay enough, until a major uprising happens and gangs of armed killers start roaming the street trying to put a bullet in the head of anyone with an American accent.  Therefore, what follows is movie about Wilson trying to get the hell out of ‘Dodge’ before he ends up on the wrong side of an AK47.

‘No Escape’ is hardly ‘story-driven’ – I’ve pretty much given you all you need to know as far as the plot goes.  Some might say that Wilson is an unlikely choice for an ‘action hero’ but this isn’t a film about a lone hero gunning down infinite waves of bad-guys.  He’s here to play the ‘everyman’ which he has already proved that he can do with his (fleeting) non comedic roles. ‘No Escape’ is hardly a ‘feel-good’ movie and paints a pretty bleak picture of a country in crisis, espeically when it leans towards social commentary (mainly courtesy of Pierce Brosnan’s character filling in some of the background as to the hows and whys of the situation they’ve found themselves in).  However, it is well shot and equally well-acted.  Wilson has two on-screen children and, as we all know, having kids in prominent roles can sometimes be a little tiring to watch if they can’t live up to the film they’ve been cast in. 

But it all works well.  It’s no mega classic, but if you’re in the mood for something dark and depressing (plus a fun performance from the ever-reliable Brosnan) then give this one a go – it’s well-acted, tense and dramatic enough to warrant just over an hour and a half of your time.

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

The Final Girls - Finally… a new take on a ‘slasher’ movie

Okay, so it’s not THAT new – after all, you still have a killer running around hacking up a selection of good-looking American teens, but – hey – it’s still better than most of the recent offerings.  The premise kind of reminded me of (the much underrated) ‘Last Action Hero’ in as much as people from our ‘real’ world end up getting stuck in a movie.  However, instead of being the ‘comedy relief’ to a much-loved Austrian mega-star, our hapless teens find themselves in the traditional middle-of-nowhere setting where they’re at the mercy of a fictional masked killer (who bears no small resemblance to one Jason Voorhees).

Therefore, like the ‘Last Action Hero,’ expect all the clichés and formulas from a horror/slasher movie to be pointed out along the way (not to mention the odd gruesome kill thrown in there).
There are no real stand-out performances here as, despite being a reasonably original take, the character types are pretty much what you’d expect, i.e. the good girl, the trampy girl, the best friend and so on.  However, this time round it’s all a little more ‘knowing’ and at least they’re aware of their own stereotypes.

There are also a few touching moments in the script towards the end that you probably wouldn’t expect from a film of this genre.  These actually make a welcome break from the general quips and carnage.

I wouldn’t have watched this film based on either the cover or the title.  I should have mentioned that the ‘film within a film’ is set in the eighties, therefore the cover art is all pretty ‘retro’ and I thought it just looked like another run-of-the-mill slasher flick.  Don’t let this put you off.  It is definitely worth a watch, but what you get out of this will depend on your existing knowledge of the genre.  The more you know about masked killers the more fun you’ll have here.  Luckily, I seem to know a lot about them, hence I had a blast with this film.

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that

The Take - Take it or leave it

I was trying to work in a ‘Taken’ pun somewhere, but, try as I might, ‘The Take’ isn’t that much like Liam Neeson’s ‘Taken’ saga to warrant its inclusion.  If you want to know what ‘The Take’ is like then I’d describe it as one of those – oh-what-do-you-call-them – type films.  In other words, those films that fall into that middle-of-the-road category that you watch because you kind of like them, but probably won’t remember them in X amount of days.

The only thing that makes it less forgettable than the rest is the ever-reliable Idris Elba who plays a CIA agent based in a European city (which I think was Paris, however it’s been over a week since I watched the film, so details are already a little bit sketchy!).  Anyway, a young thief (played by Richard Madden who was best-known for his ‘Rob Stark’ in ‘Game of Thrones’) accidentally steals a handbag containing a terrorist’s bomb (see, kids?  Crime doesn’t pay!).  So, when it goes off, all the authorities think it’s him.  Luckily Mr Elba can see the thief through the smoke and picks him up first, allowing the pair of them a little time to clear the thief’s name, bring the real culprits to justice and also stop another attack on the capital.  All in a day’s work for Idris.

So, expect the shoot-outs, expect the car chases and expect a reasonable amount of banter between the straight-laced Idris and the anti-hero Madden.  I know I’m being a little flippant when I’m describing it, but it’s a decent enough affair.  It has everything you’ll want from a thriller, with the possible exception of originality.  It’s nothing you haven’t seen before (sometimes better, sometimes worse).  The two leads play off each other well enough to at least make this worth a watch.  How many times you’ll want to watch it afterwards may be another matter.

If you’re a fan of either of the two main leads, or just can’t get enough of those films that – sort of – feel a bit like the ‘Bourne’ franchise (i.e. chases across European cities pursued by rogue agents) then you may get more than most out of this flick.  Otherwise, it’s basically one of those ‘rent-before-you-buy’ type films.  If it’s on Netflix or Amazon Instant video – it should fill a gap in your viewing schedule.

6/10 Should probably keep you awake if Freddy Krueger was haunting your nights