The New Daughter - Horror by the numbers  

Ever since The Ring hit the mainstream market with its American incarnation there have been numerous imitations where something spooky happens to someone's child/children and they have to save the youngster from a killer video tape/cell phone/computer game. In Kevin Costner's case, the killer object menacing his teenage daughter is a mound of earth. That does give you some idea of just how scary the rest of the film is.

Perhaps the first problem The New Daughter suffers from is that the `daughter' in question is just so annoying. She never stops moaning and griping (as most teenagers do I guess), only, because she's come into contact with a mound of earth, she's doing it more than most. About the only good thing she does is `take out' the most clichéd bully-girl in cinematic history.

The first half of the film is just setting the audience up with various apparently-innocent events which will all have some darker significance later on. Kevin does his best to understand his daughter, doing what all horror films' central protagonists do, i.e. look on the internet and phone a local expert who just so happens to live really close and be into just the right paranormal phenomenon that you require help with.

The second half things get a little more intense. Not much, just a little. As in all other horror films, the police and other supporting characters are there just to be killed.

There is nothing notably wrong with The New Daughter, but there's nothing particular right about it either. We've seen it all before and done better (i.e. spookier arty cut scenes in The Ring). If you've never seen a horror film before (then where have you been?) you may just like it. But I just couldn't get Lisa Simpson's words out of my head when she encountered Kevin Costner in an episode of The Simpsons. She simply said, "Poor Mr Costner - he tries so hard."

2/10 Scuzzier than the leftover goo from a Queen alien's egg sack