Ninja III: The Domination - The perfect cheesy eighties film

If ever someone was going to bury a time capsule for future generations in order to show them what an eighties movies looked like, I'm putting forward 'Ninja III: The Domination' forward as a suggestion.  I haven't watched the first two 'Ninja' outings (I must track them down!), but if they're half as good as 'Part III' then I'm in for a good time.

If you're expecting a deep and meaningful narrative with complex characters and deep story arcs then you're in for a major disappointment.  In fact, if you're simply looking for a 'good' film then you won't find it here.  This movie is comprised of only negative elements.  That's possibly why it's so damn awesome.

A ninja tries to assassinate an American politician, but, despite taking out possibly half of the CIA's workforce in the process, he's gunned down and killed.  Or so it seems.  Luckily, his spirit is trapped in his sword and is later found by a leg-warmer-clad beauty who then becomes possessed by his soul, picking up all his powers and then going out on a rampage of revenge on the poor boys in blue who ended his life.

There are no actors you'll probably know, but don't worry - everyone here does their best to elevate the cheesy script.  Calling their performances 'bad' would probably be a little disingenuous, as the director was equally inept and didn't seem able to draw much out of them.  There are plenty of fight scenes, but don't expect anything up to the levels of 'The Matrix' here.  Sometimes people will throw punches and you can see the hits don't connect, yet you still hear the sound effects and the victim falls backwards.  There's a sub-plot involving a love story between the lady-ninja and a police officer and it's as predictable as it comes.  A new character is thrown into the film at about the halfway point who feels like a different writer has suddenly taken over.  In any other film this may feel jarring, but here you just need to roll with the (fake) punches.

Like I say, this film is terrible - so terrible it's awesome.  I don't think film company Cannon hoped it would be laughably bad, but it is.  But that's what makes it so fun.  If you're looking for a film that is truly 'so-bad-it's-good' then you will definitely find it here.  I enjoyed every awful minute of it and will definitely track down all other films in the series.  Please may they be as bad as this.

7/10 if I woke up on Groundhog Day and had to watch this again, I could live with that