Scum (1979) - Raw

Wow, just finished sitting down to watch 'Scum' and it's like getting off one hell of a frightening rollercoaster.  There are times when a film's budget dictates the probability of how good it will be, i.e. if a film is 'low budget' then you can expect sub-par actors, writing and special effects. 'Scum' is distinctly 'low budget' and yet is the polar opposite of those tropes (not that it needs any giant computer-generated 'skybeams' and alien armies invading New York).

It's about a new boy (an almost unrecognisable Ray Winstone - believe it or not, he was young and fresh-faced once!) who gets sent to a borstal and ends up rising through the (unofficial!) 'ranks' of inmates until he's the 'top dog' (or 'Daddy' as apparently is the lingo of the time and place).

I hear it was classed as a 'video nasty' in its day and, although there's definitely worse out there, I can see how it was actually pretty shocking - especially for its time of release.  It's not just the - highly realistic - graphic violence, but also language and elements which many modern reviews probably wouldn't get published if they were mentioned.  Yes, it's that bad. 'Progressive' it is not.

It's hardly a 'feel-good' film and you won't finish it feeling all light and fluffy, but if you have a strong stomach and dare to take a peek into this kind of world (and in the late seventies when then world was certainly less 'PC' than it is now) then the sheer scale of how raw and realistic this is will truly blow you away.  Hard to believe that one day this little Ray Winstone will play a bad guy in a Marvel movie.  Films like 'Black Window' are just about as far away from 'Scum' as you're ever likely to see.

8/10 The Force is definitely strong with this one

Goodnight Mommy (2022) - Okay, but a bit drawn out

Damn-it, I really wanted to like this film a lot more than a did.  Naomi Watts is a talented actress and can always elevate even the more mundane of films.  She played the titular 'Mommy' - a former actress who lives in a large country house.  Her two sons are dropped off by their estranged dad after an extended parental visit and the boys return, only to find her face wrapped in bandages.

Now, naturally the two lads seem a little uneasy with their mother's appearance, but I don't think anyone would take too much convincing if they're told that an actress has resorted to plastic surgery to rekindle her dying looks and is merely in the 'recovery' phase.  The real problems start when they start to realise that her entire personality has also changed and she may actually not be who she says she is.

It's an interesting premise, but the trouble is with only really three primary members of the cast, you know full well that nothing will really happen to any of them (not until the final act, at least).  Whatever 'secret' may be going on we know that it's hardly going to be revealed in the opening five minutes, so what the film consists of is an overly long and drawn out game of cat and mouse where the children never really get any closer to finding out any answers.

Obviously, the story does eventually conclude and tie up all the loose ends, but what you ultimately have is an idea that would probably have been better suited to some sort of sci-fi anthology TV show (like 'The Outer Limits' - if that's still going!), rather than a full length feature film.  Put simply... there just isn't enough material here to justify the runtime.

However, what's there isn't necessarily all bad.  Watts is excellent - as usual - and the two young actors are both convincing in their roles - a feat many a young star fails in when too much of a movie is placed on their youthful, inexperienced shoulders.  Overall, it's okay, but once you know the set-up you can effectively have most of the movie on in the background and ultimately just wait for the final conclusion where things are revealed.  Not bad, but a bit too drawn out.

6/10 Should probably keep you awake if Freddy Krueger was haunting your nights

Devil Beneath (2023) - Sooo generic

If there was an award for ticking every horror movie cliche box going then 'Devil Beneath' would clean up at the ceremony.  Apparently, it was made in 2023 and yet felt like if it was released in the eighties it would feel old-fashioned and outdated.

Two brothers meet up at their family farm in Australia, only to find themselves falling foul to a local beastie.  Add a van-load of generic teenagers who you won't care about, let alone remember any of their names, then stamp them with the typical 'jock one' and the 'slutty one' and the 'virginal one' and you can easily figure out each one's fate.  There are some bad humans too who you won't care about (guess what happens to them?!) and some locals who have a secret knowledge of what's really happening and you're left wondering who actually green lit this film to begin with.

Not much happens in the first half and by the time the monster shows up (and I use the term 'shows up' loosely) you won't see that much of it because it's shot in a way where you can't really get a good look at it because the budget clearly wasn't high enough for anything more than a so-so computer-generated creature.

In some ways there's absolutely nothing wrong with this film - in horror terms.  It certainly ticks all the boxes, but it's biggest fault is just being so generic that there's equally nothing to remember about any of it or offer anything that any seasoned horror fan hasn't already witnessed a hundred times and done better.  About the only way you'll really think it's amazing is if you've never watched a monster movie before and aren't aware of every plot contrivance that goes with the genre.  Watch it if you like, but I'll wager you won't remember a thing about it in a day's time.

5/10 You can watch this film while you're doing the ironing (you'll still get the general gist of it)

Jungle Cruise (2021) - Saved by the cast (just)

There's a lot NOT to like about 2021's 'Jungle Cruise.' It would be easy to point out how it's a kind of 'cut and paste' rip-off of another of Disney's theme park rides, 'Pirates of the Caribbean,' and then blended with 1999's 'The Mummy.' It would be equally easy to write off the characters like Emily Blunt being little more than a stereotypical 'strong woman' while Jack Whitehall plays her inept younger brother.  However, for all the film's faults, the two aforementioned actors, combined with the lead - Dwayne Johnson - they actually make it watchable.

Like 'The Mummy' it's about a female scientist (and her coward of a brother) acquiring the services of a local man in a dangerous location (now the Amazon) during World War 1 and getting him to escort them to track down a magical item.  Meanwhile, various villains are on their tail - who are generally just 'evil dudes' so don't expect too much nuance from them (even the excellent Jesse Plemons) and Paul Giamatti's contribution is little more than an extended cameo, so don't expect too much from him.

Although it's based on a theme park ride, I found the similarities with 'The Mummy' more apparent, but that's just personal taste.  The characters could come off as annoying (and very nearly do so!), but are saved by the actors reeling in their own performances just in the nick of time.

Perhaps the main 'problem' I had with 'Jungle Cruise' is one that many a modern movie suffers from (in my opinion!) and that's its runtime.  It just goes on too long.  I could forgive the blatant green-screen filming and cheap-looking computer generated effects if they shaved about twenty minutes from the overall length.  It kind of dipped in the middle and the 'effects heavy' action scenes also went on too long.

It won't become a franchise like either the 'Pirates' or the 'Mummy' films, because - sadly - it's just too generic to really attain the same status as either of those.  It's not a terrible movie and, as I say, that's down to the cast.  I'm sure it will keep their die-hard fans entertained and possibly and children who are actually okay with sitting still for longer periods of time.

6/10 Should probably keep you awake if Freddy Krueger was haunting your nights

The Lie (2018) - Nice idea, but stretched too long

In a cinematic world where many of the biggest films involve - literally - the universe being at stake (or at least 50% of its population potentially wiped from existence) sometimes it's nice to watch a story where the stakes are, not so much minimal, but at least personal.

I hope it's not too much of a spoiler to say that 'The Lie' is about a teenage girl who 'accidentally' kills her best friend.  Distraught, her separated parents decide to cover it up at all costs.

The nice thing about this movie is that it's a concept that most of us should be able to relate to.  We may never hold the fate of the universe in our gloved hand, but we all have family we care about and how far would we go to protect them, even if they'd done something we knew was wrong?

It's this premise that makes the film watchable and should have most people sticking to the end.  Not that I'm saying it's perfect.  The simple story comes with the downside that it's not that easy to stretch it out for over ninety minutes and it's hardly a rollercoaster of excitement and thrills.  Plus the daughter isn't the easiest person to root for.  Perhaps if she was a nicer character you could empathise with the parents as they go to great lengths to protect her, but part of - at least - me half thinks that she's such an unlikable youngster that she should simply just be thrown to the police and left to rot.

However, if you're in the mood for a slow burner with some moral choices which will get you talking, you could do worse than this one.

6/10 Should probably keep you awake if Freddy Krueger was haunting your nights